Every major city has them, they’re the new meetup. The “New to Town, 20s-30s” FB groups. They’re in every category and age group as well. 20s-30s, 30s-40s, just girls, co-ed, new to town, expats, relocated from “X” city… the possibilities are endless and the actual FB groups are endless as well.

It’s a natural inclination to actually just join as many of those groups and get active in them from the safety of your living room. But are you making real friends?

Now compared to Meetup, I’m going to go on a limb and say that the FB groups are, in fact, the best way to actually make friends. Everyone (even though they deny it) is still on FB and uses it as a way to communicate with people regularly. The groups are always active, posting events and questions and typically the moderators have a great system of managing the groups. They’re easy to create and run - so it’s a no brainer as to why so many people flock to the FB groups as an easy way to connect with new people.

But of all the online friends you’ve made...how many are your “ride or die” as we so sweetly refer to each other as? How many have you...actually met in person?

It’s probably a lot fewer than you thought when you count it out. When I first moved here, I did the same thing - I joined them all and chatted with many girls, but ultimately only met, maybe 10 girls? And how many of those ladies am I friends with now? 2.  And yes - one just happens to be my ride or die (and business partner) and the other...also one of my closest friends. But despite those two diamonds in the rough, the others all faded away.

But why do some friendships work out and others don’t? I can tell you the number one reason why: COMMITMENT.

When Erica and I became friends we were both in a place where we were completely committed to making friends. We had some real talk  about how hard it had been to make good friends and realized - dude! We’re like in the same boat! Let’s commit to being friends and hanging out. And so it was. My other friend - both Erica and I met together, and it was the same reason - we were committed to being social, making friends and getting out there.

While I don’t like to compare making friends and dating - but what do you always tell that single friend who complains about never meeting anyone (but doesn’t actually try)? You’ve gotta put yourself out there. You’ve got to make the effort and the commitment to TRY. Sign up for dating apps, go out where the singles are, talk to people you wouldn’t normally talk to. The same thing for friends. You’ve got to put yourself in situations you’re not comfortable with and be social, meet up with girls for coffee or drinks, show up to a book club or a small group happy hour. You have to make the commitment to try to make friends.

So when you’re in these New to Town FB groups - are you actually making a commitment to find friends? Are you going to the events that are open to you? Are you meeting up with the folks who post a request for happy hour or coffee dates? Or are you saying yes, but you’re still staying home. If you show up to one, or two or even 10 of those posts or events - you never know. You could find your ride or die!

 

Want to join our FB group and make new friends? We're offering FREE lifetime Honey B Memberships for the summer! Just register on the website!